The Bride's Diary
Blog/Journal
Janine Slayton
About the Author
Janine Slayton is very important to the Fabulous Woman Team. She is not only one of our most popular writers she is a Copy Editor, Assistant Editor, Reporter, and Entertainment Columnist. Janine considers herself to be your typical mid-twenties struggling English major. She graduated from Roosevelt University in 2006 with her BA in English and Secondary Education. While not currently teaching, her passion for English finds her reading and writing in much of her spare time. Her other passion is music, so when her head isn't in a book, it is usually lost in a melody.
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The Bride's Diary
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Who Needs A Jumbo Tron?
Posted May 2009
"I Am Getting Married!"
Posted April 2009
Read Janine's
Journey
The Bride's Diary
TFW Main Page
Who Needs A Jumbo Tron?
Posted May 2009
"I Am Getting Married!"
Posted April 2009
It is common knowledge that, for most brides, the dress tops the list of important things to worry about
for the wedding. After all, the wedding day is the one day for a bride to shine, to be the prettiest woman
in the room, with all eyes on her. So naturally, the dress becomes a pretty important part of that
moment in the spotlight. When I first got engaged though, even before I thought about the dress and
the excitement of searching for it, I thought about more behind-the-scenes things. In fact, my first
thought was about the support group I would need to build to get through the wedding dress shopping
and all the hundreds of other things I'd need to worry about: my bridesmaids.
I don't know if all brides put so much consideration into that small circle of friends who will be standing next to them on one of the most important days of their life, but I know putting together that circle was one of the first things on my mind after the sparkly diamond took its place on my left hand. It's not that I have a ton of friends and narrowing it down would be too difficult; in fact, my problem was quite the opposite. I really only have a few really close friends, all of whom have been in my life for years. So I felt that because of that, anyone I might potentially leave out would speak multitudes.
There were so many things to consider. I mean, this group of girls will be my circle of support for the next year and a half. I have to make sure they are people I want to be surrounded by, and it would definitely help if they got along as well. And then, of course, there was choosing the maid of honor. I think that was the hardest part for me. Once I made a final decision on that, everything else just seemed to fall into place.
Why was the maid of honor choice that difficult? It really came down to the question of whether it should be my sister or not. The day I got engaged, as my boyfriend was proposing, my sister was on a flight to Texas, where she would be permanently residing until further notice. Now, even had she been living in Illinois, my sister would have been an unpredictable choice, while also perhaps the more obvious one. But add the geographical distance to the fact that my sister would be having a baby in July, and it just seemed like she was going to have way too much on her plate to worry about wedding preparations and wedding showers and bachelorette parties. My biggest concern with NOT going with my sister was her reaction. She has a tendency to be very emotional and to take things very personally, so I knew not choosing her as a maid of honor could very well lead to a long, loud phone conversation. My other choice for maid of honor also had the potential to hurt her feelings and make her upset, but I finally (after a lot of conversations with a lot of people) came to the conclusion that, on this extremely important day of my life I was going to need my right hand woman to be someone who was very dependable, and a lot closer to home for me. Luckily my sister understood.
Who did that maid of honor end up being? My cousin Genevieve. I honestly don't think I could have chosen a better one, either. She was someone I knew I could count on for a multitude of things, and while I was slightly concerned about the financial burden that the role might put on her, I knew she was the person I was going to need next to me through all of this. And so far, she's been amazing, brainstorming with me and trekking around searching for wedding dresses (don't worry, I'll be talking about the dress shopping soon-it's definitely an experience). She's exactly the person I need right next to me through all of the insanity heading my way.
With the most major position filled, it was time to start deciding who else to ask to join my wedding party. This decision turned out to be fairly easy, once the maid of honor drama was determined, though I 'm not going to lie: Even though I basically ended up with the group I had envisioned in the first place, I still went back and forth quite a bit, second-guessing and over analyzing everything a bit too much. I guess it at least gave me a taste of all of the decision-making coming up. Regardless of the back-and- forth going on in my mind, I finally finalized my group of friends, ending up with a well-rounded group I knew I could count on. There is Erin H., who has been my friend since 5th grade. She and I think so much alike sometimes it's scary, and I can always count on her to be honest about what she thinks. Next is Erin M., who I met in Jr. High. Even though once we graduated 8th grade we never went to the same school, we managed to keep in touch over the years. She's one of those people that I don't talk to all the time, but we still consider each other best friends. I know she's one of those people that will go above and beyond the call of duty, and provide a ton of support the whole way through. Next is Sarah, my best friend from high school. Sarah is the practical, detail-oriented one. When I was having a tough time finding the dress I wanted online, Sarah immediately offered to put her internet researching skills to use, and I doubt I would have tracked the dress down without her help. Last but not least is my friend Stephanie, whom I've known since my first year in college. She and I survived all four years of college together, first at community college near home and then at a school in the city. Stephanie has one of the biggest hearts of anyone I know, and I knew I wanted her energy around me while trying to figure everything out along the way.
Once I had my bridal party chosen, it was very important to me to ask them all in person to be a part of my wedding day. Of course, all being adults now with very busy lives, it was hard to find the time to see all of them in person. The suspense of waiting to see each one of them almost killed me! I did manage to see all of them face to face, and once I did and everyone said yes, I couldn't wait to get the planning started! I mean, once you have that super group of girlfriends around you to help you make all those important decisions and help keep your head on straight, you can conquer anything, right? I'd like to think so, just like I'd like to think that becoming a bridezilla is completely out of the question for me. After all, I want to KEEP these friends after the wedding is over.
The first task for me and the bridesmaids: the hunt for the perfect wedding dress. Stay tuned to see how that one goes...
I don't know if all brides put so much consideration into that small circle of friends who will be standing next to them on one of the most important days of their life, but I know putting together that circle was one of the first things on my mind after the sparkly diamond took its place on my left hand. It's not that I have a ton of friends and narrowing it down would be too difficult; in fact, my problem was quite the opposite. I really only have a few really close friends, all of whom have been in my life for years. So I felt that because of that, anyone I might potentially leave out would speak multitudes.
There were so many things to consider. I mean, this group of girls will be my circle of support for the next year and a half. I have to make sure they are people I want to be surrounded by, and it would definitely help if they got along as well. And then, of course, there was choosing the maid of honor. I think that was the hardest part for me. Once I made a final decision on that, everything else just seemed to fall into place.
Why was the maid of honor choice that difficult? It really came down to the question of whether it should be my sister or not. The day I got engaged, as my boyfriend was proposing, my sister was on a flight to Texas, where she would be permanently residing until further notice. Now, even had she been living in Illinois, my sister would have been an unpredictable choice, while also perhaps the more obvious one. But add the geographical distance to the fact that my sister would be having a baby in July, and it just seemed like she was going to have way too much on her plate to worry about wedding preparations and wedding showers and bachelorette parties. My biggest concern with NOT going with my sister was her reaction. She has a tendency to be very emotional and to take things very personally, so I knew not choosing her as a maid of honor could very well lead to a long, loud phone conversation. My other choice for maid of honor also had the potential to hurt her feelings and make her upset, but I finally (after a lot of conversations with a lot of people) came to the conclusion that, on this extremely important day of my life I was going to need my right hand woman to be someone who was very dependable, and a lot closer to home for me. Luckily my sister understood.
Who did that maid of honor end up being? My cousin Genevieve. I honestly don't think I could have chosen a better one, either. She was someone I knew I could count on for a multitude of things, and while I was slightly concerned about the financial burden that the role might put on her, I knew she was the person I was going to need next to me through all of this. And so far, she's been amazing, brainstorming with me and trekking around searching for wedding dresses (don't worry, I'll be talking about the dress shopping soon-it's definitely an experience). She's exactly the person I need right next to me through all of the insanity heading my way.
With the most major position filled, it was time to start deciding who else to ask to join my wedding party. This decision turned out to be fairly easy, once the maid of honor drama was determined, though I 'm not going to lie: Even though I basically ended up with the group I had envisioned in the first place, I still went back and forth quite a bit, second-guessing and over analyzing everything a bit too much. I guess it at least gave me a taste of all of the decision-making coming up. Regardless of the back-and- forth going on in my mind, I finally finalized my group of friends, ending up with a well-rounded group I knew I could count on. There is Erin H., who has been my friend since 5th grade. She and I think so much alike sometimes it's scary, and I can always count on her to be honest about what she thinks. Next is Erin M., who I met in Jr. High. Even though once we graduated 8th grade we never went to the same school, we managed to keep in touch over the years. She's one of those people that I don't talk to all the time, but we still consider each other best friends. I know she's one of those people that will go above and beyond the call of duty, and provide a ton of support the whole way through. Next is Sarah, my best friend from high school. Sarah is the practical, detail-oriented one. When I was having a tough time finding the dress I wanted online, Sarah immediately offered to put her internet researching skills to use, and I doubt I would have tracked the dress down without her help. Last but not least is my friend Stephanie, whom I've known since my first year in college. She and I survived all four years of college together, first at community college near home and then at a school in the city. Stephanie has one of the biggest hearts of anyone I know, and I knew I wanted her energy around me while trying to figure everything out along the way.
Once I had my bridal party chosen, it was very important to me to ask them all in person to be a part of my wedding day. Of course, all being adults now with very busy lives, it was hard to find the time to see all of them in person. The suspense of waiting to see each one of them almost killed me! I did manage to see all of them face to face, and once I did and everyone said yes, I couldn't wait to get the planning started! I mean, once you have that super group of girlfriends around you to help you make all those important decisions and help keep your head on straight, you can conquer anything, right? I'd like to think so, just like I'd like to think that becoming a bridezilla is completely out of the question for me. After all, I want to KEEP these friends after the wedding is over.
The first task for me and the bridesmaids: the hunt for the perfect wedding dress. Stay tuned to see how that one goes...